Dispute over HDB flat inheritance. Alamak! Why like that?

I have blogged about how we should not think of children as money trees before.

See:
What is our attitude towards children?

I have also blogged about how children should not treat parents as their ATMs before.

See:
My parents are my ATM.

When it comes to money issues, even family members can become enemies.

These topics are so sensitive and views are so diverse that whenever I blog about them, I am likely to get some negative feedback.

Some readers even told me they had to stop reading my blogs for a while to recover from my blunt and, what they thought, unpalatable views.

This is why the Chinese people say:

谈钱伤感情

When we talk about money, it hurts feelings. 

Hard truth.

When I read about someone who was the eldest amongst three children complaining online about how he was not in his parents' will, it was somewhat poignant. 

This is because I am also the eldest with two younger siblings in my family.

Apparently, being the eldest child, he gave his parents the most financial support. 

He felt unloved and hurt that they had excluded him from their will.

What's in the will?

A HDB flat and nothing else.

His parents told him that he already had a flat of his own while his younger siblings didn't.

He went on to lament that he didn't ask to be the first born child and that, perhaps, he should have been more selfish.

Perhaps, he should have given his parents less financial support and put more money towards preparing for his own retirement instead.

I have said before that we work towards financial freedom because we want to have options.

We want to have the freedom to choose what we want to do with our time without having to worry about money.

Unfortunately, there are things in life which we have to live with.

All we can do is to make the best of the situation.

Sometimes, life just throws lemons at us.

I have said before that we have to be a bit cynical in life and being calculative is not a bad thing per se.

However, when it comes to my parents, this does not apply.

When I think about providing for my parents so that they don't have to worry about money in their old age, I do not think of possible future returns.

Children being nice to their parents so that they could get into their parents' good books all in the hope of receiving financial inheritance?

I have seen it in Chinese drama.

It was just drama, I thought.

Who thinks that way in real life?

Well, now, from time to time, I am reminded that some people actually do.

What my parents choose to do with their assets is their business.

I might have opinions which I would share with them but the final decision is theirs.

In fact, in a recent conversation with my mom, I told her to will everything to my two younger siblings.

She asked me why I didn't want her money?

I think she might have felt surprised and, maybe, even a bit offended.

I told her I didn't need her money and that she should give it to whoever might need it more in the family.

In fact, I told her she should try to spend more money on herself first.

Why shouldn't she?

It isn't a bad way to think.

Or is it?

For sure, I am not in the complainant's shoes.

I just felt the blogging bug bit me when I read the story because we are both the eldest of three children and we both provide the most financial support to our parents.

The complainant is going to feel miserable if he does not snap out of this feeling that he should be rewarded financially (eventually) for what he is doing for his parents.

If his parents were to find out, they would feel miserable too.

At the end of the day, if he is not hurting for money, it is just money.

I always say that if a problem can be solved with money, it really isn't a problem if we have the money.

There are more important things in life than money.

“Resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.” Carrie Fisher.

References:
1. Worried as dividends reduced.
2. Inflation and my budget.
3. To better mental health.