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Death in the family.

Thursday, June 29, 2023

In a recent blog, I said that the COVID-19 pandemic changed my views on many things.

Life is so fragile and it could end quite unexpectedly.

Although I feel that everyone should try to achieve financial freedom, I understand that it isn't everybody's cup of tea.

So, live and let live.

This is something I have been saying for many years.

Nothing is more important to appreciate than this.

We have only one life to live.

We have a responsibility to ourselves to be happy.

We also have a responsibility to others, especially to those who matter to us, that even as we celebrate our right to happiness, we do not compromise theirs.

Of course, we cannot always be happy.

It is even harder to ensure that people around us are always happy.

There will be good days.

There will be bad days.

This is true for all of us.

We are only human and can be unkind to people when we are unhappy.

We lash out at people closest to us as they are the ones we are most likely to take for granted.

Of course, this is wrong.

Try to make amends later and try to be a better person in future.

Our wealth can grow if we do the right things.

However, our time on earth is limited.

We don't want to learn that we had a good thing in life only after we have lost it.

Of course, we get angry sometimes.

With people we care about, we might get even angrier.

Be angry but don't stay angry for too long.

Always think of the good that is in that person.

Think of past kindness received.

We are all unique individuals.

Even twins are not 100% alike.

Things are rarely perfect in life.

No one is perfect.

Everybody makes mistakes.

Be more forgiving.

We might not be selfless but we can try to be less selfish.

If you think that I am not feeling 100% now, you are right, but I am still OK.

I always like to say "all in good time".

It will take time for things to get better.

I remind myself that life has to go on.

However, there is a chance I might stop blogging or replying to comments for a while.

Of course, this wouldn't be the first time but it would be for a different reason.

So, it is important that I talk to myself about this.

Still, I will try to check the comments section daily.

If AK is still talking to himself, do not worry. :)

66 comments:

Unknown said...

Dear AK, my heartfelt condolences. Do be strong. Do keep talking to yourself for your sharing has greatly helped me, and others too, in gaining financial wisdom.

Unknown said...

Take Care, AK

The Sun said...

Please take care and take a break from blogging if necessary. I believe your readers will understand. You overall well being is more important.

nch said...

Hi AK,

I am sorry for your loss and take care of yourself and your family.

We may not know each other but my family and my investment porfolio and life has greatly improved from the wisdom and your talking to yourself articles that share about your life, ideas and attitudes towards investment over the years. These are points and knowledge that were not taught to us in school or advise given by any of the financial planners.

We are only humans and we have only limited time on earth.

Again, take care and take your time, my friend.

Deet said...

sincere condolences, AK. Take care.

keng said...

Hi AK,

Do take care :)

Yv said...

Hi AK

May peace and comfort be with you in this difficult time, and may cherished memories bring you moments of comfort.

Take care

Siew Mun said...

My deepest condolences to you. May you find comfort, peace and light in this time.

Lance said...

Take care!

Singapore Man of Leisure said...

Ip Man Blues Brother,

My condolences on your loss.

Do what you have to do.

Hungry eat; tired rest.

When you're ready to blog again, rest assured I'm only poke away ;)







Winnie said...

Hi AK - deepest condolences to you and your family. This person must be very dear to you. Take the time to grieve, it’s ok to not feel ok now, but I hope you will feel better with time.

PG said...

My deepest condolences to you AK.. Hope you will remain strong to go through this rough period. Please take care of yourself.

PG

Joy N. Hands said...

My deepest condolences to you AK. Thank you for the reminder on the preciousness of the time we have here with the people who matter to us. May the family come together to support each other during this period of loss.

Rellangis said...

Hi Ak, my sincere condolences... Take time off and do take care...

fisher said...

Hope all is well! - long time reader of you talking to yourself.

coven said...

Deepest condolences to u and family. Take care!

yuhui said...

my condolences, ak.

Sandra said...

AK, do take care. Everything changes and nothing lasts forever...

The Dreamzola Traveller said...

The limits of mortality.

We have only a limited amount of time in this world. Life is short and it is easy to lose our precious time which can never be recovered.

If count the amount of functional years remains within us, it is even shorter. Once we cross the half-century 50 years old, our body will start to decline whether we like it or not. Hmm, don think I can climb the Great Wall of China anymore, LOL.

If there is anything we yet to do, and can afford to do it, we should do it while we still can.
Life is short, don leave too many regrets.

effervescence of life said...

Hi AK,

Your title of the post says it all. My deepest condolences.

It must have stirred up some emotions for you to reflect on the meaning of life from time to time. Take a break. And some deep breaths too. Hope you feel better soon.

Daniel Yip said...

Take care AK!

VT said...

Hi AK,
Just want to say yours is the only wealth/DIY finance blog that I followed bcoz of no b*llsh*t marketing, and I appreciate ur selfless sharing throughout the years, whatever you might be facing now, hope you find peace and stay happy/invested!
VT

VT said...

Condolences btw * prayers *
VT

Money Speed said...

Thanks for reminding me be nice to people closest to us. Being the sole provider to my parents and my brother, I do get angry recently due to the tightening of my income and expenses. The feel of losing out sometimes really get this hatred into my mind.... Have to think of the more positive things in life sometimes...

Anonymous said...

Condolences

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wFUUbP3YWM8

I'm 45 and still hugs my mom whenever I meet her.

AK71 said...

Hi Unknown,

Thanks for the words of encouragement.

I am glad that talking to myself has been helpful to you. :)

AK71 said...

Hi Sun,

Thanks for understanding.

Appreciate your kind words. :)

AK71 said...

Hi nch,

Thank you for the kind words.

I am very happy that talking to myself has so many benefits.

For sure, no one cares more about our money than we do.

We have to watch out as most people out there have ulterior motives. -.-"

AK71 said...

Hi Deet,

Thank you.

I will do my best. :)

AK71 said...

Hi keng,

Promise I will do my best.

Thanks. :)

AK71 said...

Hi Yv,

Thank you for the well wishes. :)

I believe that time will heal and hope that it does so faster this time.

AK71 said...

Hi Siew Mun,

Thank you.

I hope so too. :)

AK71 said...

Hi Lance,

I will try to do a good job of this.

Thank you. :)

AK71 said...

Hi SMOL,

Wow! This is such a rarity!

Quick, give me 4 numbers!

You ready to poke me when I start blogging again?

Maybe, I should take an extended holiday. ;p

Thanks for the advice. Will do. :)

AK71 said...

Hi Winnie,

I am sure family is always dear to us.

Unfortunately, bad things happen sometimes.

Don't know why they do but they do.

Yes, time will heal.

Thanks for the kind words and encouragement. :)

AK71 said...

Hi PG,

Thank you for the encouragement.

Yes, I must take care of myself well so that I can take care of the family.

Will do my best. :)

AK71 said...

Hi Joy N. Hands,

Thank you. :)

My family isn't perfect and we have had many disagreements in the past.

I am sure we will have disagreements again in the future.

However, during the last few days, we have really come together to support one another.

Blood is really thicker than water.

Cherish our loved ones because no one lives forever.

AK71 said...

Hi Rellangis,

Thanks for being so kind and understanding. :)

I will probably publish a quick update tomorrow or the day after before taking a longer break, if necessary.

AK71 said...

Hi fisher,

You must have commented in my blog a long time ago because your name is familiar.

Good to hear from a long time reader.

Thank you. :)

PY said...

My deepest condolences to you for your loss AK. Please take care of yourself during this time of grief and thanks for sharing this wisdom and reminder. I've benefited from your wise words over the years. Take your time to do what you need to. Wish you strength in this time of need.

AK71 said...

Hi coven,

Thank you for the kind words.

I will do my best. :)

AK71 said...

Hi yuhui,

Thank you. :)

AK71 said...

Hi Sandra,

Yes, nothing is permanent.

However, not clinging on to people and things is only something the truly enlightened is capable of.

I will have to learn to do better.

Thank you. :)

AK71 said...

Hi TDT,

Alamak. I am 52 this year.

How like that? -.-"

Must play more games from now on!

Thanks for the reminder. ;)

AK71 said...

Hi EoL,

AK is mental.

Eavesdrop at your own risk. ;)

Thank you for the kind words. :)

AK71 said...

Hi Daniel,

Thank you.

I will. :)

AK71 said...

Hi VT,

I started blogging out of curiosity and boredom.

If I were blogging for a living, then, I would be aggressively monetizing the blog like some other bloggers we know.

To be fair, I did try to do it for a bit but being a lazy person, it didn't last long.

I have been keeping my life as simple as possible in recent years and minimal monetization of the blog is not a bad idea to this end.

Thanks for the prayers. :)

AK71 said...

Hi Money Speed,

I have great respect for people like you.

It takes a lot of mental strength to be able to do what you do.

Of course, we are only human and sometimes succumb to negative emotions.

We can only try to do better over time. :)

AK71 said...

Hi Southerncross,

My family isn't very physical when it comes to showing affection. ;p

Thanks for the video although the person who passed on was not one of my parents but someone else in the family.

AK71 said...

Hi PY,

Thank you for the kind words.

I am glad that talking to myself has been helpful.

Thanks for letting me know.

Keeps me going. :)

KC said...

Deepest condolences AK. Take care and rest well. Your community of readers is here silently supporting you.

Hello said...

Hi AK,

Deep condolences to you and your family.

When death happens it feels like life has come to a standstill, yet the world around us keeps moving on.

Take time to grieve and reassess priorities in life.

You have done plenty to share your wisdom with the common folks as us and we are deeply appreciative.

Take heart that you have many people supporting you online and offline!

Thank you once again for your generous sharing.

AK71 said...

Hi KC,

I like that phrase "community of readers".

First time I have heard of it.

Thank you. :)

AK71 said...

Hi Hello,

Thanks for the kind words and encouragement.

Resting is something lazy AK is good at but sometimes forget to do.

I will try to do better. ;)

Candy188 said...

Judging from the overwhelming outpour of genuine concerns from all corners of Singapore shows that AK has been accumulating merits through selfless hours of sharing his thoughts!

I had experienced same circumstance in Nov 2021 though unfortunately was my late father!

Time will definitely heal the sudden physical emptiness!

Just another silent reader (chat on FB on Marco Polo Marine though)!

Stay strong! Ganbatee!!

Pauline said...

My deepest condolences to your loss AK.
Please take care.

SgFire said...

Hi Ak

My condolences to you. Take care

AK71 said...

Hi Candy,

I am sorry for your loss. :(

I agree that time will heal and numb the pain.

Thank you and gambatte! :)

AK71 said...

Hi Pauline,

Thank you.

Will do my best. :)

AK71 said...

Hi SgFire,

Thank you.

Will do my best. :)

ThE AvErAgE SiNGaPoReAn MaLe said...

hi AK, saw the title of this post. Deepest condolences to you and family, man. There are times in life when some things take centre stage. Do what you need to, blogging can wait.

Hope you will take the time to grief, regroup and come back stronger.

AK71 said...

Hi TASM,

Thank you for the kind words.

Life is so fragile and it could end quite suddenly.

We cannot take preventive measures for everything that could go wrong in life.

Be kind to the people around us while they are still around. :)

ThE AvErAgE SiNGaPoReAn MaLe said...

"Be kind to the people around us while they are still around."

very true! I have had bereavements recently too and what you said is very true. even if one has 5 million dollars, also cannot buy back the time that could have been spent with loved ones after they have passed.

AK71 said...

Hi TASM,

Time is one thing money cannot buy.

So many layers to that simple statement.

I can only hope to be a better person over time. :)

VT said...

Hi AK,

My heartfelt condolence to you and your family.
It is a difficult period and my dad passed on recently too.

With my dad passing, one of the concerns I have is the financial stability and sustainability of my mum. My dad had left a good sum of money of around 2xx K for my mum and I would like to tap on your experience of planning for parents.

My mum is 65 and I do want her to possibly draw down for another 25 years if possible, and also have a contingency if a health event strikes.
With the good interest from banks, SSB, and Tbills these are now tied in such vehicles for now but I know that it will not last and possibly will need to move to other.

AK71 said...

Hi VT,

Thanks for the kind words and I am sorry for your loss.

I think for old folks who do not have too much money, when it comes to retirement funding, the best thing is an annuity.

I would top up her CPF Retirement Account so that she gets a monthly income with CPF LIFE.

If she does not qualify for CPF LIFE, CPF would still pay her a monthly sum till her 80s.

It is risk free and volatility free which gives peace of mind. :)


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